I Don't Know How to Resolve
I'm told that this is a time of renewal. A time that we look back at the year that was, and the mistakes made, in order to look forward to make changes for the better.
The problem is that somewhere along the long, the message gets REALLY confusing, and, quite frankly, that makes it impossible to succeed in "resolving" whatever issues you feel you need to fix.
Let's examine the tradition of New Year's Resolutions.
Basically, at the height of a very emotional season (usually spurred on by a liquid spirit or two), we sit around with our friends, and watch a ball drop from a building in New York. When it comes to a stop, we shout out "HAPPY NEW YEAR" (I guess if we demand it without asking for it, we increase the odds it will, in fact, be a good year), and then go around kissing our friend's significant others.
Then somebody in the group will suggest we go around the room and tell everybody our insecurities, and what we plan on doing about them in the next 365 days.
Seems like an awful downer considering I just got to kiss somebody else with my wife's permission.
The problem is the message is confusing on how we are supposed to better ourselves in the first place.
I bite my nails. I'm told that makes my hands look ugly. If I resolve to stop biting my nails in the new year, then I have succeeded in creating a resolution entirely void of any impact on the world, and entirely self serving. Itso facto...it's a BAD resolution. Apparently resolutions should have SOME degree of serving the "greater good".
So then I say, like most people, my goal is to lose weight. Maybe cut back on my wings and draught intake to a measly once or twice a week. But, by doing that, I've set the "Dove Soap" movement behind by about 4 or 5 years because I should be "accepting" and "loving" of myself, no matter what grease stain has dropped on my shirt.
I want to be less materialistic (something that probably comes as a great shock to those who know me, because I don't SEEM to take much care in my appearance). 2 problems with that. First, I just heard our Prime Minister talk about how we need people buying to keep the economy going. Second, I saw a magazine article that told me one of the 12 steps to a "better you" was making sure I bought clothes I liked in order to build my confidence (FYI it actually hurt my confidence to know I need to find a "better me" in the first place, and I can't use my favourite pair of jeans in the process of abandoning the "inferior" me).
I was told by someone, "...for the people that want to quit smoking, make the goal ‘to get healthier' as it will seem less daunting". Basically, hit the gym and try to cut back, that way if you don't quit smoking, at least you're "more fit". Great, some people are well on their way to having the best biceps for a guy with asthma.
Basically, if you synopsize all of the advice, in 2010 I'll be happy if I don't feel like I look good, but I will still buy lots of nice clothes (and donate them to the poor for the greater good). My nails will be long enough to peel an orange, but I'll have trouble eating it because there's a cigarette in my mouth (although, it'll only be my 3rd of the day). BUT, I'll offset the smoking by using a treadmill.
I miss my moms philosophy of "Anybody that picks on your faults is not a real friend".
